Question :
Know why I hate malls ?
Answer :
People are so caught up in their ultimate goal of spending as much money as their bank accounts allow that they forget to look in front of them.
You know that feeling of people looking through you or simply neglecting your presence? I just... I don't understand how we ever got to this bitterly low level of recognition among ourselves. I suppose it's possible we've always been this way and have just never changed. Wouldn't you have thought that having lived in a society for thousands of year would have taught us to look out for each other? Both literally looking out in hope of avoiding a walk-in collision, but also in the more general sense. Instead, I can't help but feel that to most people I cross I'm just an other empty shell. Thank god there are two types of people. To the other kind I'm the person they chose to hold the door for that day or decided to greet for no apparent reason.
I'm not lonely... That's not my point. I don't crave attention, that's not my point either. I know people are busy when they're shopping and have their minds preoccupied, trust I'm a pro-consumer. Somehow, that doesn't mean all standards of courtesy and politeness should be dropped as soon as you have something to do or somewhere to go.
I don't expect people to stop every stranger they cross in the street to divulge in thirty seconds how depressing their life actually is. I don't even feel a Hello is needed. It's as simple as a simple gesture of courtesy or making eye contact. When you look into the eyes of a person there's something that registers in their brain. It's like that person just let you take the first step into their lives.
Of course 99% of the people you make eye contact with you'll never see again. Heck, chances are you didn't exchange nor want to exchange a single word with them but for that split second in time you acknowledged each other. Maybe it gave you a reason to let him or her on the bus before you got on. If not, nothing is lost. The point being, you took a second to devote your thoughts to someone other then yourself.
It's called acknowledgment, and for what ever little its worth it makes me feel like we live together in a society we are all part of and care for. Otherwise, we're nothing but solitary individuals living in a common space in which everyone else simply becomes a nuisance.
All I can say is an honest smile from a stranger can make all the difference in my day.
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4 comments:
i used to play this game on the subway i called the make-eye-contact-with-someone-and-see-how-long-it-takes-them-to-look-away-out-of-discomfort game. it was fun (:
I find most people look away within a very short fraction of a second. Sometimes, when they looked for longer i would smile, and they would smile, and that would make both our days.
ps. i miss you and can't wait to see you soon!!
I find that people are so consumed by what's on the screen of their Ipods/Blackberrys/PSPs etc that you cannot make eye contact with them anyways. I also read an interesting article about people deliberately avoiding eye contact with pregnant women on the subway in order to avoid having to get up and give them their seats... Mind blowing!
lol, I played that game this summer with my friend in Vancouver, holding eye contact with people.
I read this book called Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance a year or so ago, and I remember there was a section that discussed acknowledgement of people in big and small cities.
He mentioned how in a small town, you'll notice people will generally acknowledge everyone, because on one extreme, it's actually rare to see someone on the street for example. I know when I got back to Delta this summer, I walked to a friends place a few blocks away and had 3 or 4 strangers say hello, comment on the weather or just nod in acknowledgement. It's a pretty small place. There's something about the ridiculous number of people in a big city that makes it easy for people to start to blend in to the background. It's not a real excuse, but I think for some people, it might just be overwhelming?
Anyway, when you get a chance I wouldn't mind talking about this some more
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